I saw this on my first trip to London, oh probably a dozen years ago, and it apparently left an impression. This weekend, as I am spending precious time reviewing comments from my Mentor on the first draft of Chapter 1 that I submitted at the Christmas break, I am reminded of the expression because in a way, that is what I am doing today. I am paying attention to the gaps in the first chapter of my dissertation, because they are keeping me from moving the content over to my Readers.
It's a stretch to connect the term to my Journey to Dissertation, I know. I'll just let it be a loose tie, and get to the rest of what I have to say. Once I have safely moved past the gaps here, I will be fully involved in Chapter 2.
It seems to take me a few reads to absorb what the gaps are. That may be because my first reaction is denial ("I can't believe I didn't totally nail this chapter on the first try!").
Upon the second read, I am thinking, "Well, isn't it already in there?
By the third read, I have blocked out all of life's daily distractions (except for a husband who keeps popping in and out of the house to chit-chat; Note to self: limit husband to two cups of coffee in the morning). Now I see it. Yes, My Mentor, yes indeed. You are right. I must clarify. I must revise the key question and sharpen the focus.
I know what I must do. I need to address the comments, which usually means I need more information before I can fill in the blanks. (It reminds me of having "writer's block" -- this usually means that a writer doesn't know what he or she wants to say, or does not have enough of the details to be able to produce "on command.")
In this case, I had to read more from philosopher Edmund Husserl, the Father of Phenomenology. Then, I stopped trying to reinvent the wheel. I went back and reviewed some of my critiquing papers from my PhD coursework, as I did engage Heidegger quite a bit at that time. I am more convinced than before that the phenomenological piece of this is correct and appropriate. I must convince my Mentor that I have a handle on it, perhaps. The way to do that is to answer all the points he raised, clearly and confidently.
So here I am on Saturday afternoon, looking over my response. I have redrafted the section called out by my Mentor, and have inserted more explanation on my thesis question. I will take a bit more time to consider inserting another Heidegger quote (to add to the Husserl quote that seemed best to fit the bill: “Thus reflection is required in every sense in order to right ourselves”). Husserl was a smart dude. He didn't even know that at the time he said that, a PhD candidate would come along in 2012 and find a way to apply it to her new research about literary grief. Research is so cool.
I think I have tackled the questions posed and will spend a bit more time re-reading this version before I send it back to my Mentor for another look.
I am continually reminded that the dissertation process takes time, if for no other reason than the obvious one: there is a benefit to allowing the questions and the answers to percolate in the subconscious and the conscious mind for a while.
It is fascinating that what seems hazy at first suddenly can become so obvious. Time is my enemy, so often, and yet, time is my friend. Hmmm. Such a good mantra for a dissertation writer.
Copyright 2012 By Marianne V. Heffernan
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